No Regrets

If it's a neverending game, then i guess i will play it for life. This is what gives purpose.

Like an addiction.

Avi Melech/Reyes. What nice name to give a kid.

Weeds is getting more interesting and nice. Family issues spiraling out of control yet still heartwarming. Have some really nice phrase that are meaningful. Open to interpretation.

'I am almost inclined to not ask you out again, just to show you how wrong you are about me.'

-Weeds

'You love to be loved. You pull all this love in. You build it all up in your head, and when it gets too close, you run.'

-Weeds

'Don't sit here and tell me you want to be someone else when you do fuck all to change what's going on.'

-Weeds

'Friendship in true love is ___.'

A) An overblown concept

B) A fundamental concept

C) A waste of time

D) A bonus

'At our core, the search for true love is driven by ____.'

A) Passion

B) Need for sex

C) Need for financial and emotional support

D) The basic human need to feel connected and leave the prison of aloneness

Such interesting questions.

If i treat it as a joyride, you did be the roller coaster.

Stupid For You

'People sometimes find themselves stuck in an unhappy relationship, where obviously there's something deeply wrong, and they stay because it's easier than to get themselves out of it.'

Caring alone isn't enough, same goes for love.

Obviously one sided.

Conscience makes a man do the right thing.

Sometimes i feel that there are many really stupid people out there.

A bottle a day, keeps me happy all day.

Do things with the right heart, it makes everything easier.

Tick tock, tick tock, inching closer.

Eat me alive every single moment i am awake. I am better off asleep.

These weak little excuses. When you munch them, you get karma.

Thankfully, i have no heart. You will get what you wanted.

My Last

'Death is no big deal because life is just... blah blah blah.'

'Life is just blah blah blah. You hope for blah. And sometimes you find it. But, mostly, it's blah and waiting for blah. And hoping you were right about the blahs you made. And then, just when you think you've got the whole blah damn thing figured out and you are surrounded by the ones you blah, death shows up. And BLAH, BLAH BLAH.'

-Weeds

Okay, i think i snapped. I couldn't handle this baggage like i thought i could.

Your issues are daunting. Honestly, i am at a loss. But i can't let myself drag on. One moment it's this feeling, one moment it's another. My mind is at a disorientation. Wave it off or tug it close.

Lose the steam that kept me on. Break the ties for it goes on.

Stay Close Don't Go

Something I will never do. Not under this circumstances at the very least.

Finally back from Taiwan. Pretty awesome country that i wish i could linger even longer to explore the suburban. Back at this place, how i dread it. From surrealism to the cold hard reality that continues to bewilders me.

You are such a two-face. I don't know how to face you anymore.

Being smart and meticulous does not make you anything, its simply allows you to apprehend more stuff, understand and notice minute details. Sometimes things just have to be kept from people that people didn't even let you in on, and this is the burden that you have to carry.

People do really change, for better or worse, it depends. Change is only effective when you feel uncomfortable.

Now that i am back, its meet up sessions and job seeking. Whee. I can't wait to meet those that i miss and those that wants to meet me. Excited much.

Everyone have their baggage. I just feel mine is bigger.

Decode

אהבה הוא א בעולם על את טיפשים

زه فکر کوم چې تاسو خطا ,غير أنّ ليس أنا يوقن أنمور.

Det er for meget i mine øjne, ja en tiedä mitä on todellinen.

Nu voi folosi de aceasta data sa cred ca prin, i nadam se da ste to previe

Mazel tov, muy bien a cikin fassara

Au Revoir, محبت.

تک, Mějte se a bezpečí.

Self note: Do no desperate buy.

P.S You deserve better, sweet girl. Trust me. =)

Say what you feel. Sometimes its good to act as if i ain't that smart.

Breakaway

Fugit Irreparabile Tempus

Most of the time we find excuses for the things we do, for it makes us feel better. But when the excuses runs out, that's the point when we can't cheat our way through it anymore, we got to be decisive and take a stand.

Leaving it dangling and doing it half hearted are things that one do when they are indecisive. Though its something that Jiawei is a master of. Decisiveness. Hope he's doing well on his part. Idiot, don't want to reply me. Can't even get him out now. What's going on?

Everyone's having trouble, relationship wise that is.

I like how my friend got frustrated with me and make me guilty and be decisive. Thanks to that, i have also finally taken my stand, and thats what i will hold to, at least for as long as i can. Snap snap, wake up my ideas. I actually have conscience. :) Okay, peace out.

P.S I can't stand the silence at home, it makes my every cells cringe.

My little escapade. My little sweet romance.

Fuck Was I

I just need to remain vacuous.

Yesterday meetup with Pearle, Jeremy & Violet is so so so good. I like how i am silent most of the time and i can just laugh or smile for no apparent reason. Really blissful. Everyone's pretty emo yesterday though. Seems like life has been hitting harder on us than i ever expected. Taiwan in 6 more days. Party like tsunami is hitting, it will keep my mind off any obstructions. Hopefully. Tomorrow! HTHT with Pearle, Thursday, joyride with Yan Ling, Friday, catching performance with cousins, Saturday and Sunday, work and god knows.

We are all marionettes of time and life.

Curse and swear, life and death.

Bachelor's button blooms and fade

Watch the sign for it tells fate

Miss the number and thou hates

Requite or not, its thy choice

Forget me not, Myosotis

It symbolizes remembrance

Of what unpretentious and daintiness

Time is off the equation

Weep not at the mortality

Dance not when life blossom

Harmonious like a cosmos

When everything lies on the same plane

As commelinaceae as it sound,

Its but lighthearted whisper,

As mediocre as it seems,

Its done with heartfelt joy.

P.S What the fuck am i doing with my life? Its like a downward spiral. Maybe its good to lose myself, for it loses life. Isn't it more carefree to not be so stringent with your own life, care less, worry less and lose less. Everything will seem even better. Urgh, beef me up like a jerk.

Foolish to be indecisive, futile to try and take a stand.

Don't Get It Twisted

'Some people just fall for the wrong person.'

'Don't make empty talks, Do the talk and walk the walk.'

There's so much on my mind, this is the only place that i could rant without catching too much attention or any actually.

My mind is wired up. I am getting major migraine. Its like a love hate thing that is up my mind.

I feel really bad. Fast forward to sunday pls.

I am just too eccentric to be close to people, ain't i. Like an enigma.

After musing over a long while, I feel like tattooing both my forearms. Maybe more people will shun me. Or maybe no one will even give a damn.

I really hate being atypical person that you can find anywhere along the street. Yet i just want to blend in so well that i am unnoticeable. Have u had this contradicting thoughts? I am a freaking paradox, a puzzle i myself cannot solve.

P.S My mood changes with yours. Chameleon much.

Embrace mother nature. Don't scared. Let's dance in joy of death and life.

Brighter than Sunshine

Matthew Hales

I like how he looks in 'Brighter than Sunshine'. HAWT! The way i want to be seen. I sound like a fanboy suddenly. tsk. Ouch, money is always hindering. When will it stop? Can't wait to change how i dress. Lay my hands on the things i want to get. Ahhhh, work work work.

This is the first thing i got to do when i come back from taiwan. Damn right.

P.S Who am i to say anything anyway?

P.S.S Who wakes up at 3 plus in the morning to drop a msg saying they miss talking to me? Apparently someone did. Brought a smile to my face, brightening the darkest corner. =) Stay safe. Peace out!

I am never good enough. We are all judgmental creatures. Go on, judge me, for i am judging you this instant.

What's A Clock Without The Batteries

Have u ever had the feel that time is eating you up?

Biting off your flesh bit by bit, just a matter of time before it consumes you fully.

Feeling every tick of the time creeps by, yet nothing can be done. This is like the epitome of helplessness, the worse kind of feeling one will ever experience. The escalating sense of foreboding. How long more?

When a mind overworked, it auto-format itself like a computer down with virus. It becomes a clean slate. Vacuous.

Last thing i want to talk about is the 2 greatest power one can ever possess.

1st: The mind is the most powerful thing, it let us imagine, think, apprehend and scheme. But this are not the things i want to highlight, its the power to make believe that makes the mind impressive, if not, it's just a pile of crumpled up juicy squirmy splat of pulsating organism.

2nd: The power of suggestion. People often underestimate this, because they are unaware of how this actually affects them. Suggestion slowly creeps into one's mind and start disconnecting the thoughts and reconnecting it to mess it all up. Enabling from a series of minuscules changes to radical restructuring of behaviours and emotions.

Finished Being Human Season 2 & 3. Soon to be done with The American. Working at Pioneer Mall. Feel free to come find me on 12, 13, 16, 19 & 20th march. 6.30pm to 8.30pm. =))))))))

No one wins against time. I am racing with time.

I'm Into Something Good

Guy Who Would Never Fall In Love

Interesting how i give off this impression.

Arghh, where are all these strong compelling feelings coming from. Foolish is a man, foolish is a man. I will be blatant. I miss you.

Seems like i am going to be seen in another light. Maybe. Maybe not. We will see how this turns out. Though i did hope it did turn out good.

Tell me i didn't make the wrong choice again. Honestly, i feel stupid enough. Okay, maybe i should refrain from speaking to you for a bit and i don't need any answers from you.

Intoxicate the lovelorn. Down the slippery slope, where treasure remains to be found.

If life was a medley

When i spill the beans, don't cry over spilled milk

Did it with a straight face

I am expecting it to be awkward

Love how this messes my mind

You will be tongue-tied.

Made a wrong turn, once or twice

Trying to get up that great big hill of hope

Than having you stalk my every thought

I learned to live half alive

Eventually nothing changed. And you will just laugh it off. So just put life into perspective. I can't wait to see how things fall.

It still pricks. I am doing a free fall.

Then

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I Can Do Better

*EDIT*

Opportunities come all the time, its a matter of whether u choose to take it or not.

If the gladiator sandals that i am looking for doesn't appear in my life, am i supposed to wait and not wear slippers at all? What do you think? ;)

Ahh, another word of wisdom. People just love throwing me stuff to make me ponder over. How interesting.

Today has been pretty good. Seems like i have quite a few catch up sessions soon. All this people that i didn't expect to contact me, contacted me. Makes me feel i am like some forgotten ancient that are once again found. tsk. Amanda, Amanda, when will what you say become true? Let see when i catch up with you, would i have any changes.

1. Finally started on books once again.

2. Finished 'Being Human' Season 1.

Life just cant get any worse. This is why i love being an optimistic pessimist.

I ain't no tenacious boy. Let's be flippant.

Were Gonna Have Us A Champagne Jam

This is the love.

Don't settle for a normal sandals when you've other better sandals.

Even if you know you want that sandals, as when the gladiator sandals that you are finding for ages appears, the normal sandals will pale in comparison.

Why the hell promise me when you already have plans for the same thing? Maybe this isn't about you, its about me. Never eat if it's the second bite.

I need time to convince myself.

Just a thought: If we are all master of make believe, why is it so hard for me to convince myself?

Too many emotional posts regarding love, heart and desire. This shall be the last of it.

On a lighter note, life in polytechnic is over. I am so glad. Nothing beats a warm shower to drown those vexing thoughts.

Parties pls. I need it and also the taiwan getaway. Too many issues in Singapore. Need to dump them all. Even if its for a week.

Don't hold my words like its a safety rope, its just a mirage.