Denial

Ain't we all leaving in denial? Faking constantly, with unlimited masks put on to concealed our naked self.. Human we might be, our mind are unfathomable. It's so tiring to fake it everytime you see someone or something yet the feel you get has already changed.. Yet you dun wish to let go for the fact you might feel bad for ditching or that you will regret in the future.. We often complicate our thoughts and sink into despair.. I am really tired pretending to be who i am not, i am sick of myself, sick of how i am.. Really, what is friend? Do i have friend? Friend, it just seems more and more vague to me, it seems like a physical fallback.. Do we even need friend? Maybe i am taking every friend for granted, so much so that everyone seems like acquaintances to me.. But really, friend, to simplify everything, its just a 'tool' in one's life.. Really, its just people complicating it and finding excuses like friends will be there for you when you are down.. This merely round down to what i say, 'tool'. Maybe i am just being cynical, but yea, thats wat i am holding on to right now.. Beautifying the ugly truth.. Maybe i will distant away from my friends again, lead a normadic life rather than a stable life when in the end when we part, we wont feel that sad.. I am sick of changing but i am just too sensitive abt everything..

Another thing, promises, promises are just dillusionary self comforting sentences. We often promise things we wont do eventually, like playing mind games with one another and see who will win.. Pointless stuff.. I shall stop making promises as well.. I dun wish to be a corny mumhead as well.. I am starting to hate it..

Sorry, if it comes to that day.