Lots of thoughts have been going through my mind this week yet i could only elucidate one of those things which sets me thinking and keep me feeling lousy.. I was thinking of the fact that we activated 'free rider' for FOM project to reduce Firi's marks down to only 50 for his participation.. But seriously, that whole day after we activated that, i was wondering, does he deserve only 50 out of 100.. Because to me, giving him only 50 out of 100 is too harsh and adding to it, i seriously dun wish to undermine his result juz because of a lame excuse like wat if he do better than me.. Come on, i seriously dun really care, and that even if he is to beat me in that, that juz mean that he is good.. That is juz a stupid reason and pls dun think i am such a lowdown person.. The reason is juz too lame for me to accept that he simply deserve 50 out of 100.. Personally i feel he deserve much more than 50, like at least 75 for the minimum.. But since the whole group(including me) put 50, he accepted and yea.. I was seriously troubled by this for that whole day.. GOD DAMN IT!! But yea, in the end i feel that its no point pondering over it since i cant do anything to undo it..
Anyway, yesterday was quite fun, went sch but seriously have no mood so didnt really pay attention to any of the lesson.. Was totally anticipating for the nite life that i have planned.. Though it wasnt very good, i still appreciate u guys for making an effort to come.. Thanx.. And i will definitely plan it again after exams.. I feel so weird after jerry 'fortune told' abt my life for this year, it seriously got me pondering abt things.. Since when am i so superstitious. geez.. Seriously, i have to save up, been spending quite a lot recently.. Damn damn damn..
Chinese New Year is juz ard the corner yet i dun feel anything.. And that projects and exams are drawing nearer.. I could hardly breathe..
I feel like a failure everytime i think of it.. Hope i can find the answer soon..
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